RedAsh's Blog

What I to be is to be a man,
who is gentle, kind, and knowledgeable where everybody seeks me out for help.

You act according to the image you have of yourself, the identity you’ve built in your mind. There are things you don’t do (like robbing banks, killing people, or stealing your best friend’s girl) not via willpower, but because you have a standard for yourself, tied to your identity, that you aren’t willing to violate.

Think about something you have trouble avoiding (like eating junk food) and something you have no trouble avoiding because you’d “never do it” (like scamming the elderly out of money) and you’ll understand. It’s not about willpower. It’s about raising your standards, about seeing yourself as a person who’d “never do” whatever it is you want to avoid. When it’s not who you are, you don’t think twice about it.

The road isn’t easy. It involves demanding change from yourself, rethinking some of the ways you’ve been doing things, and you’ll have internal resistance to that for sure.

The key is to decide what you won’t settle for anymore, and to drill that into your mind over and over again until it becomes ingrained in your personal identity. Until it’s not something you want to do, but something you are.

At the end of the day, it simply boils down to,
What have I done to become what I want to become?

So far, I know that it is my principle,
1> to not to talk about the bad beings of other people behind their back
2> to talk about my being of other people in my front