RedAsh's Blog

Today is the memorial of my younger sister, Jye Shin, she wants nobody to meddle into her affairs anymore and let her be. She is 14 and she told me to regard her as dead; as if she never exists before, even in my Late mother's womb - her birthplace of her existance.

To me, she is dead.

Its only a week after my younger brother, Ken, who is 9 years older than Karen (aka "new" "her" - Karen is but another being with the same outlook as Jye Shin, nothing more), had taken guardianship of her and promised a new system of more "adult-like" lifestyles; and her moral degeneration had hit rock bottom. From the usual 6pm to 9pm, then to the point of "no return". I had no idea what idea Ken had injected into Karen meanwhile, but it seems to be his own philosophy, which, by my empirical recall, is questionable...

Reason to stay at her friend's home? Because she had stolen 20 bucks from Ken on Friday, 4th May 2007, who was going to Malaysia, and returning on Monday, 7th May 2007. She was afraid of facing the wrath of Ken and decide to leave home for good.

In return, she demand a whole lot of terms and conditions from Ken, who did not even lay a single finger on her, just so to agree to return home.

What worse is the irresponsible words that escape her mouth during the course of event. She mentioned hating all relatives of my late mother relatives (highly regarded in my heart) , who had been showering her with concern and encouragement, ever since I finally manage to move the whole family back from our aunt house and to our own house. Reason? She is inferior in all aspect to a cousin who is only 1 month elder than her; Yet, she keep making comparisions to her friend, Stephine - who had no parental restriction at all.

She also cried about her "lack of privacy and freedom" in home. This kind of crap, after all the while on 5th and 6th of May 2007, she was enjoying T.V. programs and was not even reprimanded with a single word from me - for not revising in the mid of her mid-year examinations...

It a fact that phrase 1 of my plan had succeeded, of trying to post Ken as Karen pillar of support, Karen behaviours and mentality seemed to had spurned out of my reach...

I wonder if only at the point when her friend's mum call up to fetch Karen from her home in the middle of the night, did I made up my mind to send her to rehabitation centre,

OR the time when my dear brother bring the topic of being Karen's guardian I should reject.

I may feel less remorse... for letting such degeneration to manifest in Karen... Had my plan backfired, for deciding to let Ken to be more involved in family affairs through Karen?

This song is dedicated to my dead sister and hope her all the best in her future endeavours...

The seaweed is always greener
In somebody else's lake
You dream about going up there
But that is a big mistake
Just look at the world around you
Right here on the ocean floor
Such wonderful things surround you
What more is you lookin' for?