RedAsh's Blog

Hi Mum,

Tonight marks the end of 2008, so that last post for 2008.

I had started another new phrase of life and experience with SCDF, beginning from 29th Dec 2008, and possibly ending on 10th Jan 2009; or if all goes well, on June 2010.

Many reasons I was asked, why I got myself acquinted with SCDF,
1> for the money to keep rolling in
2> to call it quits with SAF

But for the BIGGEST reason, is because I wanna be NOT (the old) me. THE me where all live problems source from the monitor, and solved through the same channel.
I am losing the sense of reality, and this is a problem that I had identified. I need to understand society better. I have to stop begin a nerd, revolving around sci-fic and mythology.

The simpliest way to describe it, I need something to "wake up" my fucking idea; as least those ideas which are still sleeping in me...

SPF rejected me, for my "superior" eyesight; there do exist something where the bigger number does not means better. And also thanks to that nonchalant senior police officer who are totally uninterested in simple pickpocket cases.

Anyway, here I am, in SCDF Mum. Some of my fucking idea had been awoken:
1> Expectation of 0530 waking
2> Sense of Duty
3> Sense of Discipline

Although no all had been awoken yet, but I will dig into myself and search for them, inorder "to be a Better Man". All with the 34,000 SGD at stake...

I finally felt the sense of urgency that I had not felt for a LOONNNGGG time... the type where 15 mins meant something HUGE...

A guy by the name of "Far East", he initiated a little conversation at the bus stop, that developed into a lengthy conversation. Also, there is this guy, same age as me, but a father of 1, by the name of Khairy. He helped me to open the path to some others, into his group.

Anyway, it helps as it opened up my circle. I followed them to their little "break" but being mentally tired, I felt asleep in the MRT; there is this white indian lady wearing a revealing dress that practically shows half of her breast, short of her nipples... Oh WTH... and her BF is an SCDF regular too.

Whatever the case is, I cannot handle people, and maybe why I was into IT. And I am set to break this barrier that is holding me down.

Mum, I do have doubts about my designation of begin a Sect Commander.
The thoughts of having to handle others people lifes gives me the shuddlers.
How do one knows if one is ready to be a Fireman?
How do one knows if one is ready to be a Sect Commander?
What qualitities MUST be in place?

Questions without answer, but only for now Mum. Give me Strength. And not forgetting, Happy New Year Mum. =)